Category Archives: HUMOUR

He had been a client of mine since 2007. For nearly 15 years, my predictions came true, and he kept consulting me—until one fine day, everything went wrong. I offer two kinds of services: Direct Answers and Detailed Reports. • Direct Answers: I give straightforward answers—no beating around the bush, no jargon. Ask, “When will I get married?”Continue reading “Vinasha Kāle, Viparīt Buddhi”

Life is sexually damn simple for Western men. Porn at 13. Sex by 15. Multiple partners by 18. Cohabiting by 20. Break up, move on, repeat. If dating fails, they walk into a brothel or call a number from a magazine. No cops, no cheating, no shame—just business. Now look at Indian men. Forget theContinue reading “Don’t Use a White Man’s Morality Compass to Define Indian Men”

In India, people often consider it a virtue to feed stray dogs with dry chapatis or pigeons with yesterday’s rice. It is preached as charity, compassion, and even religion. But one question remains unanswered: if feeding stale food to dogs is virtue, then why isn’t feeding goat and beef meat to lions and tigers alsoContinue reading “The Selective Virtue of Feeding”

I sometimes doubt myself — am I intimidating? We recently stayed at a hotel, chosen by my wife after sieving through 50 options. Her reason was practical — it was the only one offering complimentary breakfast. So we did something completely out of character for our family: woke up early, dressed up by 8 AM, andContinue reading “The Intimidation of Not Fitting In”

The current generation of Indians is possibly the first to experience air travel on a mass scale. Their parents and grandparents mostly travelled by trains and buses — the default modes of long-distance travel in India for decades. And that legacy hasn’t just influenced their mindset — it’s practically hardwired into their DNA. In India,Continue reading “Why Do Indians Stand Up Before the Plane Comes to a Standstill?”

Welcome to India — a country where hypocrisy is not just a character trait, but a celebrated national pastime. Let’s begin with a paradox wrapped in irony and served hot with a side of denial: Nearly 40% of expats in the UAE are Indians. Yes, UAE — a Muslim-majority, Sharia-practicing, monarchy-led country. And what do theseContinue reading “Why 40% Indians in UAE Feel Safe Among Muslims, But Not Among 15% Back Home?”

Governance is hard. You know what’s easy? Distraction. Forget employment. Forget affordable housing. Forget air you can breathe or water that won’t kill you. Just master the ancient Indian political playbook — not the one from Arthashastra, but the WhatsApp University edition. Here’s your foolproof guide to keeping a billion people happy — or atContinue reading “How to Keep an Indian Happy for a Year Without Providing a Decent Living”

Publicly humiliating someone has always been a favourite pastime of the petty. It’s an age-old sport played by people with empty lives and loud opinions. And right now, India’s national issue seems to be Aamir Khan—60 years old, successful, intelligent—having a partner half his age. That’s the crisis. Not unemployment. Not inflation. Not the stateContinue reading “Aamir Khan, Bangkok, and the Hypocrisy Olympics”

No shit. 

If I am alive today—and I say this with all due reverence—it is thanks to two extraordinary men. Not my parents, not my doctor, not the scientists, not the gods, but two towering figures of the 21st century: Mr. Narendra Modi and Mr. Donald J. Trump. Let’s start with Mr. Modi. During the great COVID-19 apocalypse, when theContinue reading “Modi, Trump, and Me: A Survivor’s Tale”